Article Series

10 Common Parenting False Assumptions

In just about all areas of life, we humans tend to make lots of assumptions. Those we make that are accurate serve us well, while false assumptions almost always create problems. This series addresses 10 false assumptions that any good and well-meaning parent might make, and could interfere with parenting efforts.

INTRODUCTION

False Assumption 4: Love is Enough

If I just love my kids enough, everything else will fall into place. There was a book written in the early 1970’s I believe, titled, “Love is Not Enough.  As the title suggests, the author’s primary objective was to drive home the point that when it comes to parenting, there is more involved, more required of us parents, than to simply love our kids.

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False Assumption 6: They Won’t be Affected

If my kids don’t seem to be listening, they won’t be affected by what I say about them to others. In my book Parenting With An Attitude, I go into detail describing what I call a child’s sponge-like brain. I suggested the idea that our kids are constantly absorbing into that little sponge, data that comes their way.

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“In spite of our determination to avoid repeating the mistakes our parents made with us, we may still be influenced by them.”

“If you want to see changes in the other person, start by looking at your own behaviors and the possibility that yours are actually perpetuating what you dislike in the other. ”

“Holding a grudge when our kids have disappointed us sends the message that our love and acceptance are both conditional and that they must somehow earn back the privilege of being loved again by us.”